Holiday Spirit
by signelchan
Summary: Shikamaru can't seem to catch a break this season. Drunk and down in his luck, he tells the story of what exactly put him in this position. /Late Christmas fic./


"It's early morning on Christmas Eve, and all I know is that I have severely screwed up the holidays for everyone except myself. And even that I'm beginning to doubt." The words fell out of his mouth like they had come into his mind: rapidly. He was ashamed at the situation, how he had taken holiday spirit and ruined it, and that he was still alive to see the consequences. His hand gripped the handle of the glass even tighter as he said, "Man, if I had just stayed out a bit later last night, gotten a bit more wasted, spent a bit more time with my family, none of this would have happened."

"You haven't messed up my season yet," his friend said, pouring him another glass of eggnog. "And there is nothing in the world that could possibly do that except you offing yourself." They stared at each other in an awkward silence. "You aren't going to do that, are you?"

He took a swig of his drink. "Not now," he said after swallowing and making a bitter face, "but maybe later. Haven't decided yet."

"What happened, exactly?" the friend asked. "You never told me that."

"Well, you see..."

* * *

A week before Christmas, Konoha experienced a cold snap that left the villagers frozen to the bone, and it wasn't just in the temperatures that things had dropped. It was the yearly event known as Sale Week going on, and few customers were shopping due to the weather. One prime example of this was the Yamanaka Flower Shop, where no one had come in to save big on poinsettias or wreaths for their holiday decorations.

"I just don't get it," Ino, the daughter of the owners, said with a long, drawn out, sigh. "Why does no one want to brighten these dark days with beautiful flowers?" Neither of her parents answered her question directly, but her mother did mention that maybe there was competition with some of the other stores, and the people were just shopping there more.

This is where I came in, delivering my family's gift to her family. I cautiously opened the door, because I saw the ticked woman behind the counter, and if I knew one thing, it was that when Ino was mad, she was a beast. Too bad I even had to enter the store that day, because as soon as she noticed that someone had come in, she was all over it.

"Shikamaru! Hey!" she squealed, seeing that it was not only a person, but it was me, of all people.

"Hello, Ino," I replied, making it very clear that I was only in the store to deliver the gift. "Just dropping this off."

She pouted. "Not buying anything?"

"I did all my shopping weeks ago. Now it's delivery time."

Her pout became even more prominent. "Not even a single rose for your lover?"

"I don't have a lover."

"Oh, okay. Glad to know that." Her words were sarcasm-laden, and it was at that second that I realized she was serious.

"Ino, please don't be starting rumors again."

I thrust the package in my hands at her. She knocked it onto the ground, and the item that was in it, a glass pig, shattered, before she ran up the back stairs, crying.

* * *

"That isn't that bad, man," the friend said after the story was over. "She did that all because of her own stupidity."

Shikamaru shrugged. "So maybe that isn't that bad. But my day just got worse and worse from there, and having an upset Ino to deal with later is not a very good thing in my book."

"Well, what else happened?"

"So, it was about an hour after I left the shop..."

* * *

The steam coming from the people's mouths just proved the fact that it was freezing outside. These brave souls were spending this time to do what they needed to, which was shop while all the good sales were around. I was on my way home, because the last gift I had needed to give was the one to the Yamanaka family, and that encounter had ended so well.

My body was shivering, and I was paying more attention to my hands, making sure that they weren't turning blue, that I didn't see someone run in front of me and trip. I stepped on them.

"Excuse you," the girl I had stomped on shouted. I looked at her and realized it was Sakura, this girl I'd known for a long while. "Next time, make sure you know where you're going. And I hope you slip."

She got up and went on her way. And, true to her wish, I was on my back within seconds.

* * *

"Okay, now that is bad," his friend said, shaking his head. "Is that was drove you to this drunken state?"

"Dude, that happened a week ago. What happened yesterday put me into this miserable mood."

His friend sighed. "Shikamaru, why would you bother telling me that stuff if it had nothing to do wi---"

"Just listen."

* * *

The morning before Christmas Eve normally is one of those stressful times for me, and this year was no exception. Well, this time, it was a bit different, because I woke up with a pounding headache and duct tape across my mouth. Since I couldn't speak, I grunted.

"Oh hello there," a male voice snarled. "Great for you to be awake."

"Yes, this is great! You were being so annoying last night, so sorry if you're uncomfortable," a female voice chimed in.

I flailed my arms around wildly, since I couldn't speak. "I bet you're wondering why you're here. We found you wandering around in the snow, drunk like all you'd had yesterday were drinks. So we brought you in."

"And when we were trying to, ahem, get into the Christmas spirit, you were being too loud, so I snuck out here and taped your mouth closed. I'm surprised you didn't throw up and kill yourself or something like that." She laughed. "Not like I want you to die or anything..."

My hands got up to my mouth and ripped the tape off, causing me to cry out in severe pain. When I gathered my wits, I said, "Never would have expected you two to take me in."

"Yeah, but you ruined out night, Shikamaru. After she got back, it just wasn't the same."

All I remember next was walking out of the building, rubbing my eyes as if trying to remove the image of the two of them in bed together, and how the heck they didn't get tangled together.

* * *

"You mean that it was your fault that I was attacked by a very angry couple of ninja?" his friend asked.

"Yes, Chouji. That is what I'm saying. I took to drinking even more after that, which puts me here. With you."

Chouji put an arm around his friend. "Well, like I said, you still haven't ruined my season."

"Great friend. Trying to make a fairy tale out of a horrible week. I see how it is now."

"...Shikamaru?"

"What?"

The friend cleared his throat. "Erm, when I was attacked, I heard a wonderful story about a _threesome..._"

* * *

A/N: This is a veryyyyyy late Christmas gift for iflip4dolphins. I'm so sorry it took this long. DX

It also could have doubled as a contest entry, but I couldn't be bothered with fitting the criteria.

I don't own anything.

Any guesses on who the couple was that "rescued" Shikamaru?

Siggy~


End file.
